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Beloved Leader: February 2007

Beloved Leader

On-the-spot whimsy and wisdom from a Benevolent Despot.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Birthday Dumplings...Umm!

What a week, dear readers! Bush's boy caved at the negotiating table, Putin financed my Blogger upgrade, the "little woman" went on a shopping trip, and it's my Birthday!

Excuse me, I must get back to the party.

Friday, February 09, 2007

I Love These

Enjoy.

Escape?

Escape?

Three words: Free. Range. Prisoners.

Do not have to feed them.
Do not have to keep them warm.
If they fall down and bust their heads open, it is no skin off my teeth.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Hello, Comrades

Last month, my blog cadre was contacted by a major American propaganda organ wanting to publish a feature on my little window to the internet. I am not supposed to say which one. Suffice it to say, my photoshop cadre defected to the west via Japan with $US visions in their eyes, but the long arm of the state security bureau wrung their ungrateful, scrawny necks before they saw one copper penny. I believe this action pissed in the propaganda functionary's corn flakes, since I have not seen my brief interview published anywhere. Whatever.

The five party talks. I got some good concessions to return to the table. No mention of that counterfeiting cowdung or my foreign currency-raising pharmaceutical exports. The Chinese tipped in a case of Hennessey and two indentured Indonesian masseuses. V. Putin even offered to upgrade my Blogger account free of charge. What a guy.